Three Cheers for Kindergarten
August 18th, 2010
Today is my nephew Luke’s first day of kindergarten. In honor of that, I’m posting something I wrote about my son Sam’s first day that happened three long years ago:
The First Day
It’s 6:30 a.m. and I’m in bed half-asleep. Or at least I am until I feel a little hand start to pat my cheek. Cracking open my eyes in the dim morning light, I see Sam, standing next to the bed, smiling like it’s his birthday or Christmas or something. I squint at him blurrily and seem to remember something big is happening today, but I’m not quite awake enough to grasp what it is. “Good morning, mommy,” Sam whispers. “Guess what day it is today?”
“Oh, honey,” I croak. “I don’t know. What day is it?”
“IT’S MY FIRST DAY OF KINDERGARTEN!” he shouts.
Jolted awake, I leap out of bed, which does my groggy 38-year-old head no favors, then take a deep breath and look into Sam’s eager little face. And then, very gently, very kindly, and in my most motherly voice possible, I blurt back, “Oh, crap. That’s TODAY?”
But of course I know it’s today. After all, I’ve talked of nothing but kindergarten for months now, trying to get Sam in the appropriate state of educational hyperactivity that would set him on the path to genius. And when I wasn’t talking about it, I was thinking about it. Or e-mailing about it. Or drawing abstract pictures of it in crayon. Basically, I’d been a 100-percent, total kindergarten freak ever since he “graduated” from preschool last spring, just like all of the other moms I knew.
“Did you go to your kindergarten round-up?” we’d ask each other. “Did you get him registered? Did you figure out which teacher you want? Is your school highly ranked? Is it ranked higher than ours? What’s the teacher to student ratio?” It almost felt like I was taking a test, even though I wasn’t even the one going to school.
As the first day grew closer, we kept busy attending kinder socials, and kinder orientations, and we spent hours shopping for new pencils, notebooks, and folders. I even took Sam to the mall where he tried to impress the teenage salesgirl at The Gap by telling her he needed “cool” pants for kindergarten. Soon came the flurry of excitement as everyone in the neighborhood received their class assignments, and immediately compared notes. By the time “Meet the Teacher Night,” came around, I was exhausted.
“Was it this crazy when I started kindergarten?” I asked my mom one night on the phone.
“Oh, please,” she said with a snort, “We just dropped you off at the front door with a nap towel under your arm, and hoped you’d make it through the day without peeing your pants.”
Stifling a yawn, I kneel down in front of Sam so I can get a good look at him. Unlike most mornings when he stays in his p.j.s until the last possible moment, today he’s already dressed himself in the outfit we picked out last night – Star Wars underwear, cargo shorts, a light blue polo shirt, and the de rigueur Crocs. The blonde rooster tails that nest in his hair are all loudly crowing; the kid is nothing short of adorable. But then I take a longer look at him and notice that he seems to be having trouble keeping the wary smile from sliding off of his face. In fact, he sort of looks like one of those unstable contestants on American Idol. Like he’s waiting to hear what Simon thought of his off-key rendition of “Heatwave.” Excitement meets nausea meets terror. It’s not a good look, to say the least.
I put my finger on Sam’s chin, gently pull his face over to mine and say, “Hey, kiddo. What I meant to say is, of course I didn’t forget about today. It’s your big day! You’re a kindergartner now. Yay!” He smiles at me tentatively, but then surprises me by leaning in for a hug—something most five-year-old boys avoid like the plague. As I hold on to him, I fight back tears, and two thoughts immediately pop into my head. One: It’s going to be a hell of a long day. And two: Would it be totally unacceptable to have a shot of tequila right now? Just to take the edge off a little? I decide against it, but only because the liquor store isn’t open yet.
After settling Sam and his brother Jack down to breakfast and a few minutes of The Backyardigans, I pop open a Diet Coke and begin the first day of what would now become our daily dash to get ready for school. Lunch packed? Check. Backpack organized? Check. Paperwork signed? Check. Wearing a bra and clean clothing so that the other parents don’t think I’m a deranged carnival worker on the loose? Aw, shit.
But by 7:20 a.m., I’m pleased to see that everything’s pretty much under control. At least nobody’s in the closet, curled into the fetal position and sucking their thumb, anyway. Then my husband Chris walks in. He waves at me sleepily, sits down next to Sam and ruffles his hair, saying, “Hey! Look at you, all ready for kindergarten.” I smile as I take in this nice father/son moment, but then, to my horror, an expression of uncertainty flashes on Chris’ face and he scoots just a little closer to Sam. This is not going to go well; I just know it.
Now, up until this point, Chris has been very relaxed about Sam starting school. Very relaxed. “What’s the big deal?” has been his standard response every time I’ve freaked out about teachers, school supplies, Sam’s future in the U.S. Senate, etc. So I guess you could say that when he suddenly starts peppering Sam with more questions than a Guantanamo Bay detainee faces on a daily basis, it’s a bit of a surprise.
“Are you excited, Sam? Do you know your classroom number? Is it 120? 121? 122? Do you remember that Mommy and Daddy will pick you up right after school? Do you know where we’ll be? Do you know what the door looks like? Is it black? Brown? Tan? Corrugated aluminum? Which is it?? Do you know your teacher’s name? What about her middle name? Does that have a silent “t” at the end? Do you know our home phone number? Do you think it’s going to rain? Do you think it’s going to hail? Do you think the barometric pressure will drop or just stay the same for a few hours? What’s the square root of 360? Is it 10? 14? 16? What is it? WHAT IS IT?!”
Fortunately, both of our boys are too far under the spell of the TV to notice that their daddy has suddenly morphed into Regis Philbin on crack, so I’m able to pull Chris away before he starts in on the lightning round.
“What are you doing?” I hiss. “He’s already freaked out enough today. He doesn’t need your help.”
“What are you talking about?” he stammers. “I was just asking him about kindergarten.”
“Oh, come on. You were 10 seconds away from bringing out a waterboard and nipple clamps. I mean, I’m pretty sure the kid doesn’t know where Osama Bin Laden’s hiding, so can you lay off, please?”
He just looks at me and shrugs, and I realize for the first time that maybe he’s a little anxious about this whole thing, too.
Softening, I say, “Listen, it’s alright to be kind of nervous about today. I know I am.”
And upon hearing that, he instantly regains his footing. “First of all, I’m not nervous,” he responds. “What’s the big deal, anyway? It’s just kindergarten. He’s just going to go sit in a room with a bunch of kids learning his ABC’s and singing songs about bunnies. So, there’s nothing to worry about, right?”
Riiiight.
To be continued…
Entry Filed under: Uncategorized
30 Comments
Add your own1. Karen at French Skinny | August 18th, 2010 at 8:37 am
I love this.
I’m already crying and my kid’s not going for another year.
2. Lisa Rae @smacksy | August 18th, 2010 at 10:10 am
This is making me miss my kid who is only four and not going to kindergarten for another year… Okay, good. I think it passed. I’m good. I’m fine, really. (It never passes does it?)
3. Cheryl | August 18th, 2010 at 11:25 am
I hate when you do this! To be continued? Are you freakin’ kidding me? It’s not as though this is the first time you’re writing the thing. Sheesh! If you weren’t so damn adorable, I’d let BlogHer know what you just did.
4. the mama bird diaries | August 18th, 2010 at 11:34 am
My daughter is going to kindergarten in a couple weeks and now i’m crying. Jesus Wendi.
5. Tweets that mention Wendi&hellip | August 18th, 2010 at 12:02 pm
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Karen Peterson, Wendi Aarons. Wendi Aarons said: Memories of Sam's first day of kindergarten. New post: http://tinyurl.com/25f628x [...]
6. Sophie@Fabrications | August 18th, 2010 at 12:07 pm
Men. Pch.
I’d cry too, but I still have 2 weeks of summer vacation, closely followed but nearly a month of the high bloody holidays.
Tomorrow we’re going on the train. I hope the AC there is cranked up to the max. Also, we’re still 2 years (and 2 weeks and said bloody holidays) away from kindergarten for that.
7. Candy | August 18th, 2010 at 3:09 pm
What have you got for the first day of senior year of high school? I need a book-end to the first day of kindergarten, which I remember like it was yesterday. Why wasn’t it yesterday?
8. Plano Mom | August 18th, 2010 at 8:05 pm
My youngest starts middle school on Monday. I’m out of town and I’m going nuts. Husband will NOT remember to take him to open house… he won’t wear the decent clothes he owns…
@Candy – Senior year was pretty easy for me (the oldest). They’re still home, but so busy you hardly ever see them. It’s a good way to get used to them being gone. The hard part was 18th birthday. That will sneak up on you, kinda like when fire ants wait to do their pheromone thing and strike all at once.
9. Liz @ Peace, Love & Guacamole | August 18th, 2010 at 8:47 pm
Oh for crying out loud, I’m now in tears. Plus, you made me dig out the baby book and find the letter I wrote to my oldest when she started Kindergarten two years ago…and now I just realized I have to write another one for my son before Monday. Are you going to come babysit so I can get all this done in time??
10. Liz @ Peace, Love & Guacamole | August 18th, 2010 at 8:48 pm
P.S. PlanoMom’s fire ant/pheromone comment is totally freaking me out.
11. A Mom on Spin | August 18th, 2010 at 9:21 pm
Do you think the same will work when my YOUNGEST goes away to college next week????
12. Erin I'm Gonna Kill Him | August 18th, 2010 at 10:04 pm
Does he maybe know where Bin Laden is hiding?
I’m sure I’ll be a wreck when my son starts school. I’m already taking offense to all the clatter about that weirdo married to Brittany Murphy sleeping in bed with his mother. What’s wrong with that???
13. anymommy | August 18th, 2010 at 10:30 pm
Mine start in two weeks. I’m totally nervous. I want them to be good and I want them to love it and I want the peace and quiet and OH GOD, I want no one to ever hurt their feelings, ever. Besides me. But I always say I’m sorry. I love that I’m not the only mom that drops off without a bra.
14. alexandra | August 18th, 2010 at 11:16 pm
Oh, you put the TBC in at just the right moment, it was starting to get a little too hard to read through the blurriness of the tears…
15. Twenty Four At Heart | August 19th, 2010 at 1:03 am
As you now know, I’m positively ANCIENT … and yet, I still remember MY first day of kindergarten. I do! I was so excited and thrilled to be there. I also remember, vividly, the first day of kindergarten for all three of my kids. My youngest is 15 – !! I told you … I’m ANCIENT!
16. heidi | August 19th, 2010 at 6:49 am
Tears! My Sam started K last year. I was so busy taking pics, that I didn’t realize he had turned around from the bus line, and came back to me. He said: “Mama? would you walk me to the bus?” And then EVERY parent at the bus stop cried.
The end.
17. CSY | August 19th, 2010 at 7:04 am
WOW! Talk about choking up! Mine have all started school and my oldest (girl – 13) reminded me that NEXT year she’ll be in high school!!! I’ll have a high schooler, a middle schooler and an elementary schooler…can’t they all go back to being babies?!?!?!
18. Roxanna | August 19th, 2010 at 7:37 am
My oldest is starting kindergarten and my middle is starting preschool in a couple of weeks. I’m in denial. I guess it’s time to take them shopping, huh?
19. ann | August 19th, 2010 at 8:07 am
Just when I think I know where you’re going, you bring out the nipple clamps
Love this.
20. KLSC | August 19th, 2010 at 8:18 am
Yep, more bleary-eyed mornings just around the corner….just hoping the nipple clamps stay in the closet!
too funny
21. Lulu and Moxley's Mom | August 19th, 2010 at 10:45 am
As I am predisposed to worrying about things before necessary, I am already thinking I will never have my kids ready and someplace by 8 am every day in 2013 when they start kindergarten. Don’t you think school should start at like 10 am or so for everyone’s sanity?
22. dale | August 19th, 2010 at 12:02 pm
College is really hard too – they don’t come home after school and tell you about it! They are living in an apartment, house or dorm with girls (WTF?) living in the next room.
My son is a senior this year, which means that next year he will have a job somewhere in this world! THAT feels like the end already!
23. The Flying Chalupa | August 19th, 2010 at 10:45 pm
Lord, I’m going through all of this right now – and my son is TWO YEARS OLD AND STARTING PRESCHOOL! It’s insanity. I have a pizza luncheon coming up with his entire class. And school hasn’t even started yet. I’m going to be a wreck when real schooling starts. Either that or I’ll be a raging alcoholic.
24. Carolyn Online | August 20th, 2010 at 6:44 am
Oh my god, the innane questions! My husband does that too. Just when I get everyone calmed down he comes in a pokes at them.
25. Diane | August 20th, 2010 at 5:58 pm
When my first 2 were sent off to K, I put them on the bus and it was much easier that way. Now I get to take #3 right to the classroom door. I’m not a cryer – but a sucker for seeing others weep. I hope I can hold the tears of joy back to have 3/4 of my children back in school. What a long hot summer!
26. Cassie | August 21st, 2010 at 10:44 am
Wait til they graduate from college!
27. Laura | August 22nd, 2010 at 6:55 am
Lump in throat…
28. Jessie | August 22nd, 2010 at 6:46 pm
so this is what i have to look forward to, eh? i hope it doesn’t come too fast!
29. When Pigs Fly | August 23rd, 2010 at 7:58 am
“Nipple clamps,” nice touch and hilarious. I think it’s probably as stressful as sending them off to college the first time. While I don’t know either sensation as I don’t have kids I can remember my mother in both cases.
30. Amy | August 29th, 2010 at 10:55 pm
Luke’s first day was great! So quick in the morning, he almost forgot to give me a hug and kiss. Then when we picked him up from after school program a HOUR early, he asked us to come back later. His grandpa called tonight and asked what his favorite part of Kindergarten was…his response…After School Program and recess!
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